Should this happen?

To end my month of March hiatus I signed up for my first ever "professional" massage. I was so looking forward to this but also quite apprehensive. I never thought I would have the courage to have a massage because of my surgeries. An uncomfortable position for someone that has had to have a mastectomy. I decided to treat myself to this hoping for some relief from both the physical and emotional stresses of day to day life right now.

What I did not expect was to be turned away from having my massage today because I have cancer.  I was asked to fill out a few pages of paper work and sign a waiver, which I did. However, when we discussed my cancer she told me she would not be able to give me a massage since I have cancer, that  they were taught there is a risk of spreading the cancer from massage therapy. I believe its from stimulating the lymph system. Even though I am considered NED ( no evidence of disease),  I am actively in treatment, I would need a doctors note with permission to have a massage.I felt humiliated, sad, disappointed and like I wanted to run out of the building!

The massage therapist was nice and was not rude to me at all. 
She's just following protocol and looking out for my best interest. She did say I could get a note from my Onc and come back.It was just hard to hear and caught me off guard which was embarrassing. The situation was just difficult.



 I am a bit torn here. As a Personal Trainer, I too can refuse to train someone if I feel there is too great a risk, and require a doctors note if I feel it is necessary. So, I understand that. At the same time, I can't help but feel  I should be able to sign the waiver, understand the risk, and make the decision myself.

• When I just spoke with my nurse after I got home, she said it does happen sometimes ( that people are turned away). The massage therapists are afraid of spread, braking bones and lymphodema.She said, next time just get a note from my Onc. and it would be fine. I told her I wasn't feeling very "massagy" anymore. My hubby told me "  The best massages are here at home anyways. You would have been disappointed". I think he's right.
• We talked about how this situation today may have been prevented. Perhaps some overall health questions on the phone or online before you show up for a massage and have to be told at the last minute " I can't give you a massage if you have cancer".

On the bright side...I kicked it in my spin and yoga classes and after I had a little pity party decided I was not going to let this one thing take away from the great morning I had already had!

Image Reborn Foundation...just registered!

Here is just a little information from their website. I hope I am chosen to go. It sounds like a wonderful experience with other survivors. An opportunity not many of us get. Fingers crossed!

"Our mission is to provide no-cost healing retreats to women who have been diagnosed with breast cancer. The focus is on encouraging women to reclaim their sense of personal power and to strengthen them in their journey toward healing on all levels and living fully".

Image Reborn's Living Beyond Breast Cancer retreat program is designed and facilitated by a highly professional staff with backgrounds and experience in addressing the special concerns of women with breast cancer.
The retreats run weekend programs, and are conducted in the beautiful, peaceful mountain setting of Park City, Utah. Approximately ten guests can be accommodated at one time.
The Program includes:

• Women's Support Group offering the opportunity for participants to share experiences, kindling courage and understanding, allowing them to rediscover a sense of personal power.
• Education: Opportunity to visit in a small group setting with healthcare professionals regarding available treatment, including conventional and integrative approaches.
• Nutrition: a positive and delicious approach to food.
• Exercise: gentle movement and stretching specifically designed for women with breast cancer.
• Journaling: instruction on how to utilize journaling to enhance life.
• Massage Therapy: light professional massage for relaxation and pampering.
• Rejuvenation Time: private time to allow for rest, contemplation, or whatever each individual desires.

http://www.imagerebornfoundation.org/index.php

Looking back at 2011

2011~Looking Back

It is the first day of 2012. As I have looked back over the past year I am thankful  for another year that God has given me.
2011 in Review~

1) We were fortunate to take 3 trips~ Chris and I spent a weekend  at Lake Murray to celebrate Valentines day. We stayed in a cabin and did a lot of hiking. Officially together now for 30 years!
Took a fantastic and much needed trip to Kauai, Hawaii and a fall camping trip filled with biking, kayaking and rest.

2) This was another  difficult year for me health wise.I had my 4th diagnosis with cancer.It had re-occurred to the chest wall as a local re-occurrence. Here I learned that breast cancer can come back in the form of a rash, which it did. Another biopsy, chemo and  25 more radiation treatments to the chest wall. This was the most severe burn and worst fatigue I have sustained so far.  My other medications remain the same with many difficult side effects.
Trying to get some relief from headaches I began working with a neurologist and have been diagnosed with migraine disorder. Advil on a continual basis works well but not much luck otherwise.

3)We welcomed the addition of our newest daughter-in-law Stephanie who has relocated to Texas from England and married our oldest son Tim!
Our first grandson Liam was born in October and I am loving my "Nonna days" every Friday with him! Nikki and Kevin had both moms and Nikki's sister in the delivery room for his birth. Seeing his little body and hearing his first breathe and cry had to be one of the most amazing experiences I have ever had. And yes..I am head over heals in love with this boy!
And sadly, we said good-bye to my cousin Joyce, our friends son Ryan, my sons friend David and a family friend and fellow runner Agnes.

4)This was not a productive year with my running or any races. We did not climb a mountain or even host the annual Family and Friends Turkey Trot. All disappointing to me.
What we did accomplish! My friend Vicki and I hiked 12 miles. This was the day I learned (the hard way) one of the side effects of Tykerb affects the hands and feet and ended up with severely burned and blistered feet.
My daughter-in-law ran the Komen 5K. I had planned to run it but was just not ready.
Although I did not host the annual turkey trot, Chris and I did run our own 5k Thanksgiving morning and I had an unexpected PR!
Enjoyed many jet-skiing trips,with one on my birthday!
The most exciting activities this year by far were kayaking to hidden waterfalls, snorkeling beautiful oceans and exploring the "garden Island' of Kauai!

5) A few special events/ celebrations; Our youngest son Matthew was the graduate this year from UTD!
My friend Natasha and I attended our second  Komen Brunch/ fashion show for survivors.
Chris and I had a blast get dressed up and seeing two concerts at The Myerson this year, Chicago and Manhiem Steamroller!
A surprise "black sock" birthday for my husbands 50th! All the kids joined us as we rented a house on the lake. Chris' friends and family all pitched in to give him 60 pairs of black socks! Fun times!

6)A year of changes~ Decided to pass the family boat on to our son Kevin. I know he, the other guys and his growing family will have so much fun creating new memories. I know uncle Jim would be happy with this choice :)
With the arrival of our first grandson, my husband refinished the family cradle that has been used by 9 Minich babies with Kevin being the first and his son Liam being the latest.
With the help of 13 other ladies, we made a beautiful cross-stich quilt that was finished the day before he was born and delivered at the hospital.
7) Around the house~
My garden did well in the Spring and quickly declined from there. I am considering a giant sand box for Liam now :)
We continue to remodel and completed the huge task of installing wood floors which we love! Traded in the big green family sectional couch for a new, smaller set better suited for "empty nester's". Due to several severe Texas storms we had a new roof put on the house as did most everyone in our city.
Lots of new paint and re-decorating.Decorated our room to bring the calm colors and feelings of the beach, my favorite place.
 
8) I am so thankful  to continue training and teaching my 5k run groups, ladies boot camps, swim lessons,and personal training.I hope to continue growing these classes and having the opportunity to meet new people and share these passions with them.God blesses me with each of them and the strength to continue.
I enjoyed my first A-Z writers challenge so much I decided to start attending a monthly writers group and have submitted a few stories to magazines and writing contests which has been fun!
An at home video Bible study, Your Body, His Temple with a couple of friends was perfect during this time.
9) We had a wonderful Halloween taking Liam for his first trick or treat.Thanksgiving and Christmas with our  family and friends filled our home again this year. This Christmas we had a big family sleepover with both of Liam's families; grandparents, aunts, uncles and of course his mommy and daddy. A sleepover with 12 adults and one baby was quite fun!

10) And lastly, my personal victories for 2011. Celebrated my 13 year cancerversary, 47th Birthday and 27th wedding anniversary! To date I am NED..no evidence of disease :)

I enter 2012 with Hope....                          .HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Looking Back

It's Friday, and there are eight more days until we begin the celebration of Christmas together. This year will be a bit  different from the past. It will be my first Christmas as a "Nonna" (grandma). It will also be the first year we are having a family sleepover on Christmas Eve! Not just my kids and their families, Liam's other G-parents and their whole family!Yup, 13 of us having a slumber party! Twelve adults and one baby boy.
My last post was about "slowing down" and making some changes. So, am I up to all this? Honestly, I am not sure.But, boy am I looking forward to it!

 At this time of year I tend to feel overwhelmed. The anxiety and fears sometimes get the best of me. Even with all  that I am looking forward to.  While writing this I decided to look back at what I wrote a year ago. Some of the feelings are the same, some have become easier to deal with. Realizing, this may just be ongoing and need a little "tweaking" from year to year.
  http://elayneminich.blogspot.com/2010/12/all-wrapped-up-for-christmas.html

And then.....I read the next post http://elayneminich.blogspot.com/2010/12/every-time-i-think-it-cant-get-any.html and was reminded to have faith and to trust God in all of this. Weather it is about having the energy and stamina for the holiday celebrations or worrying about what next year will look like. None of it is in my hands.
  By looking back at last year and seeing these same struggles I felt before, followed by  the truth that He makes it so much better than I could ever imagine it to be, find myself once again, looking forward to Christmas 2011 and celebrating Him who makes all things possible!
                                                     "MERRY CHRISTMAS"! ~ elayne

Changing Perspectives

It's been a  while since my last post. In part I have just been busy, but I  have also been working on "Changing Perspectives". I suppose we all reach points in our lives when we have to make some adjustments. This is one of those times. Put quite simply, we are tired!
 I was speaking with a good friend and she said "you guys have not had time to rest or recover from the past 5 years. I have known this, but for some reason it was a "light bulb moment". Although our lives remain full and busy, we are trying to slow down and prioritize.We have recently made a few changes, some easy, some not.
After weighing the pros and cons I decided to discontinue teaching  5k classes through the Parks and Rec. dept. This was not an easy choice. I met some wonderful people and was able to share my love of running with them. I will continue to teach 5k classes on my own and hope to rejoin the community another time. For now, I am very thankful for the ladies I am training.
This next one wasn't actually planned. My laptop crashed so I have been limited to computer time. This gave me the opportunity to realize how much "white noise" I was dealing with. The internet has made it possible to keep in touch and connect with so many people and I love that! With that opportunity also comes maintaining so many relationships which can be a bit overwhelming.However, my blog has been a good outlet and I do plan to continue writing.I had stopped going to the Writers group and really miss that. My plan is to rejoin them in January.
I am still running, but nothing like before. I have struggled with that. The fatigue from this last round of treatment really nailed me. Building back up in all areas has been difficult, but I am feeling less of the fatigue now and running a bit more.
Each year I like to have at least one event that I participate in. We made the decision to cancel the Family and Friends annual Turkey trot this year...another hard choice. Chris and I did get up and run 3.1 miles that day, just by ourselves. I had a surprisingly great run!
Although I may not have run an "official" race this year I am content with conquering the Kayak/Hike trip we did in Hawaii! That was an adventure!
Now that I have my grandson in my life, he too has become a wonderful priority. I have been putting aside one day a week to spend time with him...and we are always open to babysitting :) He is good medicine!
So, here I am still after all these years trying to find the balance between a full, happy life with metastatic cancer and recognizing when to rest and give ourselves permission to take the time to  heal and recover.

I'M GONNA LOVE YOU THROUGH IT...

Finally received the "official" report from my CT scan. I am, once again dancing with Mr. NED....NO EVIDENCE OF DISEASE! Next test will be a PET scan in December.

 Thank you to all my friends and family. Please watch and know how important all of you are to me. Especially the # 1 person fighting this with me...my hubby Chris ♥ My thanks and ♥ to all of you!

Give yourself a break!

This was a conversation I had last night with my husband;
Me; Chris, I still feel so bad. I am so tired, still having many side effects, and can't do the things I want to do.

Chris; Well, how long did Dr. A. say it would take after treatment before you would begin to turn the corner?

Me; 2-4 weeks.

Chris; How long has it been?

Me; ummm...it will be a week tomorrow. I guess I need to give myself a break huh?

Chris; ya think?

Alice's Bucket List

Today I ran into a very special blog written by a 15 year old girl, Alice. This young lady is wise beyond her years and is also living with a terminal cancer.Her mum suggested she write down a "wish list" or "Bucket list" on her blog to share with family and friends. Well, it has reached far beyond her inner circle and is touching many lives all over the world. To read her story click on her link.
http://alicepyne.blogspot.com/

Her blog and "bucket list" made me question a few things as I have had mixed emotions in this area.

1) If and when creating a bucket list is right for a person facing a terminal disease?
2) If you do create this list, should you share it?
3) Is it a sign of giving up, or acceptance of the possible inevitable?
4) Should everyone create their own "bucket list" as none of us know what tomorrow will bring?

I think in my own silent way I have been chipping away at this list, I have simply called it a "goals" list. Not because I have felt a need to do as much as possible in preparation for an end, but more out of wanting to live my life to the very fullest I possibly can. No matter how long or short the time I have is. After all, do any of us really know when God will call us home and have we done what He called us here to do?

Teaching & Training

I love this time of year! My schedule gets very busy but I like it that way. I have started my "Little Swimmers" swim lessons again this year and am having a ball with them! The change to teaching kids and getting in the pools is always fun and welcome. Here is a slide-show of many of them.
Click link and scroll down.
http://elayne-foodforlife.blogspot.com/p/swimming-lessons_31.html

I train a wonderful group of Ladies in my "Group Fitness" classes and Personal Training. They work hard and are some tough women! Most of the classes are held outdoors, however we have been hit with extremely hot weather early in the season so we have all opted to move indoors to my home gym...much better! If you would like to see some of the fun things we do in our classes click link and scroll down to slide-show.
http://elayne-foodforlife.blogspot.com/p/outdoor-group-fitness-training.htm

And Finally, we are about half way through the evening 5k Run class. I have to admit, I am kind of dreading running in this heat tonight but....I guess I have to go as I am the teacher :) My husband Chris has been coming out and running with the group. He is one of my "subs" and has been co-teaching with me. Last week I was sick with a sore throat, nausea and dizziness. Went to the Dr. to be sure I was ok. Just had a lot of fluid built up in my ears and sinus.
I love what I do and Thank God everyday for the people he puts in my life and the ability to continue on!