14 YEARS!

                  Today is my Cancerversary of 14 years!

The First nine years with stage 3, and the last five with stage 4.

I  spent my morning doing an hour of yin yoga and then swimming to "test" out my lung :) I felt pretty good, just a little sore.

‎"you're safe not because of the absence of danger, but because of the presence of God" ♥

Today's Biopsy

Thank you everyone for the prayers today. The short version of today is...It was kind of rough...they removed about 32 oz. of fluid from my lung.... kept me for observation doing a series of xrays to make sure the lung had not been hit or collapsed...it is hard to take deep breaths...but I am home now and on rest for 24 hours :) Chris was by my side every moment that he could be. Please continue to pray as we await the results. 

Waiting for me when I arrived home was a wonderfully clean house, thank you Maria! And some goodies from my  son...Thank you Matt ♥ 

Biopsy scheduled

I received my MRI results from the brain scan today...everything there is fine :) The chest x-ray confirmed the pleural effusion (fluid on the lung) but nothing else new.
TOMORROW morning at 9:30 I am having a biopsy on the lung to get to the fluid. This has been the area of concern. I will also be awake during the biopsy with only a local drug to numb the area.
The risks, as I have been told are; collapsing a lung, bleeding and infection. Needless to say, I am not looking forward to this :(
It means a lot to me to know you are praying for tomorrow, my family and the doctors... as well as the results. Your prayers and encouragement are very much appreciated! Thank you.

Waiting...

Home after 3.5 hours at the hospital. Had the brain MRI , Faslodex injection and chest xrays. They were trying to get the doctor to do the lung biopsy today but he wanted me to have the xrays done. No results...waiting...praying...



"Teach us, O Lord, the disciplines of patience, for to wait is often harder than to work".~ Peter Marshall

Update

 First up is an MRI of my brain TOMORROW at 1:00, followed by my monthly faslodex injection.

My PET scan is being looked at today,  the doctors will now  decide about the biopsy on my lung. Hope to know that answer tomorrow when I am up there.

 Todays fun~ decompression therapy....not exactly the 2 week break I was hoping for :( but....

               With faith, there is always hope. God can move mountains. ♥

Tumour Markers changed everything....

Needing prayer warriors...if you don't mind keeping Chris and I in prayer.

My original tests did come back looking good, however there was a small amount of fluid on my lung. My Onc. did not feel it was enough to biopsy and with my scan looking fine otherwise, he said to just check it in 3 months with an xray.

That was before my tumour marker results came in. They are high, very high. Now the fluid needs to be checked. Two doctors are being contacted to give their opinion on whether they feel they can safely (risk of collapseing my lung) get the fluid for a biopsy. If they say yes, then that is the next step. if they so no, I have no idea what is next.

With my history of headaches, they may also be ordering a brain scan. The lung is the primary concern right now.

I guess the specific prayer request would be for discernment for all the doctors on weather or not to do a biopsy, and if so that this procedure goes well, without complications and that the fluid does not show any cancer. Or better yet, that the fluid is gone altogether.

Also prayers for Chris and I as we are having a hard time wrapping our heads around this again and could use your prayer support.
Will update when I have more news.
Thank you friends & family

Closing with something that brings so much joy to my heart, a picture of my grandbaby boy.

Dear Cancer....

photo found on a facebook page of a little boy, Jonathan, fighting liver cancer, also stage 4

 Friends and Family.... my tests and labs are all fine! Just waiting for the tumour marker results. The PET scan looked good. The one area of concern is some fluid on my right lung. It was there last time ( 6 mo.ago) and has increased slightly. Dr. A says there is not enough to do a biopsy. He said it could be from all the damage from the radiation and there is nothing else surrounding the area to indicate cancer, but we have to watch it.. I will have a chest x-ray in 3 months to check it again.

The day of testing went better than it ever has. I felt calm, did not have any problems with migraine's or even a headache! Much, much better!

Dr. A continue's to remind me that my situation is not ordinary, or as he put's it "your just weird"!  I think he encourages me with how well I have done so far without letting me forget the reality of this disease at this stage.He mentioned a new chemo that will be out soon that is showing promising results for people who are HER2+. He said, "I hope we don't have to have that discussion but it is another tool in our back pocket".

I mentioned that it has now been 5 years since the Stage 4 diagnosis...he gave me a hug and said "I love you guys"!

 Thank you Lord...thank you prayer warriors, friends and family :)

Facing Friday

Six more month's have come and gone and it is that time again for labs, testing and my semi annual meeting with my oncologist.

I will be having a PET scan which is the test I tend to have trouble with. The 24 hours prior requires you to have no sugar, caffeine or exercise. Then no food or drink after midnight.
The lack of food and caffeine triggers migraines for me. This will be the first PET scan since the changes I have made eliminating foods that cause inflammation.

Although I still have some headaches, I have not had a migraine for a while and the headaches are reduced tremendously. We will see how this plays out on Friday.

I will have my lab results and PET results on Friday when we meet with Dr. A. The tumour marker tests take a bit longer to get back so I will have to wait on those.

The last testing came back showing "No evidence of disease", however, the tumour markers were elevated.

We will be praying for NED once again and for all labs to be in "normal" ranges. We would love to have you join us with your prayers, thoughts, well wishes, fingers and toes crossed!!

I feel unusually calm so far, only moments of worry now and then. Keeping my time busy with swimming lessons, Liam and watching the Olympics is helping! I know that God gives me the peace and comfort through all things.

This testing will mark 5 years as a Stage 4 cancer survivor...Facing Friday with Faith.

4:17 AM

Today I woke at 4:17 AM with my head spinning..wondering..thinking. This time of the day is, to me, the middle of the night. So, this is quite unusual. This also happens to be my 48th birthday. When you are a 4x cancer survivor of nearly 14 years, every birthday is a miracle! So, no I do not mind at all sharing my age.

What had me up at 4:17 am? I woke up thinking about my birth. I don't actually know what time I was born ( maybe 4:17 am), or who, if anyone was with Barbara, my birth mother on that day.

I thought about my kids when they were babies, and Liam, my grandson. So much happens in those first three months of life. But who was I with? Who held me, fed me, rocked me? Was I held or rocked or loved? Did I even have a name, what did they call me?

Somewhere out there someone took care of me from this first day of my life in July. I have always wondered who and would love to meet them someday if ever possible.

On October 26th, my parents took me home for good. They have been my mom and dad since then. As we celebrated my birthday this past Sunday with my parents I could see how much they love and enjoy Liam, my kids and my husband.
But...one thing really stood out to me. Seems simple in conversation but it meant a lot to me. We were planning a pool party outdoors that day. The heat and humidity were awful reaching  temperatures of about 109.
We talked about how we were glad we moved it indoors, especially with the baby and both my parents who have had some health issues lately.

My dad said they were not going to have been able to get in the water anyways.Yet, they were willing to come sit outside in that heat...just to be there on my birthday!

I still wonder about my BIRTH day and the following months. I am so very thankful for Barbara who was there on that day and made the choices she did, and for my mom and dad who have been there for every Birthday since.

Summer Highlights and Whats Next

It has been two months since my last post, I have definitely been neglecting my blog updates. Summer time is my busiest time of the year as my days are filled with teaching swimming lessons.
I am currently getting ready to begin Session 5, which also happens to be my grandsons first swim class! What a wonderful place in life to be able to teach not only my grandson but second generations of kids I taught when they were young! Along with a whole new generation...I am quite fortunate to be able to say " I love what I do for a job"!
Otherwise our summer has been filled with jet-skiing,spending time with our kids and grandson Liam, working on our yard and a very happy veggie/herb garden this year!
 
The decompression therapy ended in May. This treatment worked wonders for the pain I had in my neck & back as well as the tingling and weakness in my arms and hands. I do however feel it starting to increase again and plan to go for maintenance therapy as long as I need to. I begin that today.

At the end of August I return to my PC doc to have labs done. These will check my B12 levels, Vitamin D, Magnesium, thyroid and cholesterol. I have not added the oral vitamin D because I am in the sun for about 3 hours a day which SHOULD  be giving me my daily needed amounts. I continue to take medication for the hypothyroidism and B12, both seem to be fine. No side effects that I can notice.
Unfortunately, many of these problems develop from cancer treatments. Most likely the  hypothyroidism was caused from radiation to my neck. Also, our bodies can not always absorb the nutrients as well from certain medications which may explain some of the deficiency's.

I continue to work with my dietitian following the LEAP program. Now in my 3rd month and feeling better than ever! No migraines at all since my last post in May and the headaches are reduced by a good 95 %! Have them now and then but I can usually pin point a questionable food that was consumed. For the first 6 weeks the immune system is able to calm down and the body to detox.
At 3 months I am allowed to start adding certain foods back into my diet, one at a time to see how I react. I am actually a bit nervous to start this for fear of feeling bad again. But...for my birthday here in July I am looking forward to watermelon!!
It is not an easy program, but it is manageable...and well worth it! As mentioned before along with the improvements with migraines/HA I continue to improve in the areas of energy, less fatigue & anxiety, sleep, clearer thinking. An added bonus, I have lost 15 pounds and am at my goal weight!

Now to just get back to the gym to keep my body strong and stretched. I get a few yoga classes in but distance swimming and cycle are on hold till my swim lessons end. I don't have that much energy :)
Next up- August 3rd are my next scans, labs and oncologist visit to go over the results.I am trying hard not to focus on this and worry, but it is hard. Chris and I would love for you to join us in prayer for these upcoming tests and results.
Will try to update more often so these posts are not this long....Thanks for stopping by....

Liam's first tube ride!!

What I learned during my Hiatus was.....

A lot! My March Hiatus was taken at the beginning of March for a month. A month turned into nearly 3 months. I have realized it was much needed and I am so glad I took this time to work on "me".
I would love to share the different paths this part of my journey has taken me on and the results thus far.
Step one was decompression therapy. I am still going once a week and it continues to be very helpful with the pain I was experiencing in my neck and spine.The changes have been amazing and I feel much stronger in these areas. Best of all I don't need continual pain medicine and neck rubs to ease the pain. I am not sure it helped with headaches as much as I had hoped and I think this therapy has done all that it is going to do for now.

I did find a new primary care doctor that I am very happy with. She was worth the 3 month wait to get in as a new patient! She took her time with me and was very understanding and receptive to how I have chosen to live my life as it pertains to my health care needs. I needed a doctor who is ok with exploring complimentary care along side of conventional care. This has worked the best for me. She is  pleased with the changes I have been making. I was also looking for a doctor who understood I want to be on as few medications as possible, pertaining to meds used for sleep, anxiety and bouts of depression. To date, most docs encourage me to stay on these with the mindset of "you have stage 4 cancer, it's ok to be on these meds".And I agree, until the person/patient feels they do not need this help anymore. Many of these meds are meant to be temporary. Unfortunately, I think we as stage 4 patients tend to be seen as "temporary" and therefore there is not a lot of concern for the long term use.

I did have labs done which showed I am deficient in B12, vitamin D and magnesium,as well as having hypothyroidism. I am taking medicine for that and B12 for now. Can only add things in one at a time.

I also received my LEAP testing results and am currently working with a dietitian.The results were quite surprising. I have allergies/sensitivities to 30 foods, with the main 3 being chicken, cows milk and rice.By removing these foods, all 30,  from your diet it allows the immune system to calm down and the body to detox.I am on my 5th week and the results have been incredible!

~ fewer headaches and migraines! The severity of both lessened quite a bit and regular Advil was able to control the last migraine. That would never work before.
~ energy is up and fatigue is down! I needed to sleep about 2 hours everyday before with a terrible sense of fatigue. If I need to rest now, it is short and I usually don't fall asleep.
~anxiety is way down!  After 5 years of continual stressors my body seemed to stay in a constant state of anxiety. It is now nearly gone and this medication has been cut in half so far!
~sleeping is better! The big change here is I am tired at the end of the day and ready for bed. Before my body was so uneasy that I couldn't sleep. I am now completely off medicine to help me sleep and just using a small dose (2 mg) of melatonin for sleep.
~Overall I have noticed clearer thinking and a calmness I  have not felt in many, many years!
This has been life-changing! I am so glad I took the time to explore the complimentary care in combination with conventional care! Physically I continue to swim, cycle and do yoga...all have been instrumental in this process.

So, I will continue on,as this will be a life-change that remains on-going, but my Hiatus for now has come to an end. I have swimming lessons booking up my summer quickly and have gone back to teaching!

I Survived!

Did you have a favorite post from the A-Z Challenge? I would love to know which one you enjoyed :) Thanks for following along!

Z is for zzzz's

The A-Z blog challenge has come to an end. I have once again enjoyed reading, writing and being a part of this challenge.Thank you to all of you who followed along, left comments and shared your blogs! With an hour and a half to spare I am now going to catch some zzzzz's!

Y is for Yin Yoga

As I have continually looked for different disciplines that help me get through the day to day as a stage 4 cancer survivor there has been one practice in particular I have come to love.
The class is called Yin Yoga. We practice holding poses for anywhere from one to five minutes. During this time your concentration should be on breathing and relaxing into the stretch or pose without having "monkey brain". Your thoughts should remain focused on your breath.
I have found the discipline of holding, sometimes difficult poses for prolonged periods of time while keeping your concentration focused has been so helpful.
I have found  my strength, flexibility and endurance have greatly improved. Not just in yoga class but in other sports as well like swimming and biking.
The mental discipline has also been incredibly helpful especially during times of tests and treatments. When  you have to lie still for long periods of time having MRI's, Pet Scans and the like done, the practice of Yoga comes in very handy to help you relax and concentrate.
I walk away every time feeling less stress and anxiety than I felt when I walked into my Yin Yoga class.

X is for X-Terra

I have always wanted to write about my "dream' car, a Nissan X-Terra for the letter X in this challenge. Just didn't have a reason other than I would love to someday have one. So, this is the story of how I almost got my X-Terra.
 As I mentioned our camping trip did not start out well. About an hour into a two hour drive we were stuck in traffic and my trusty Pathfinder, loaded with kayaks, bikes, gear and pulling a camper begins to overheat. We needed to get off the highway. We pulled off and barley make it to a Chevron station with smoke pouring out from the hood.

As we sat there stuck, I was quite impressed with the helpfulness of complete strangers when they saw we were in trouble. A few places were suggested and after two hours of sitting in the gas station parking lot we found a place that could fix it...for the next day. Hmmm.
Thankfully, our son, who will do just about anything for anyone, came to our rescue! He helped unload all the gear, hooked the camper to his truck and drove us to a nearby campground.Even though we did not get to our original destination, our vacation was saved!

As my Pathfinder was being worked on Chris and I talked about the fact that it may just be time for that X-Terra.
Two days later another of our son's drives up to pick up the Pathfinder for us. Tis great to have such wonderful sons :) It turns out it was something minor compared to what we had first thought. So, my trusty Pathfinder is back and running and I will just have to wait a bit longer for that X-Terra, which is just fine with me :)

W is for Wierd!

My husband and I love to ride bikes, mostly trail riding. However with all the "injuries" to my neck I am not supposed to ride on rough trails.
Well, we decide to go mountain biking and ride the "yellow" trail, the easy one.
It started out exciting. Getting on our bikes, heading into the forest to ride! As we approach the trail I am already asking " are you sure this is not going to be too rough for me"? Ladies, our definition of too rough and our husbands are NOT the same!

We continued on,I enjoyed a lot of the ride, complained most of it. Unfortunately my headaches don't take a vacation just because I  decide to and I had one during this ride. Rocks, stumps, twists and turns just did not make for a fun morning for me.
It gets better...my husband stops and gets off his bike and says "do you see it"? I am thinking "do I really want too"? A 5 foot long black snake is right on the trail in our path. Chris gets a long stick and pokes it. Snake plays dead. Then Chris tries to flip it over, snake moves! then it slithers back into the grass and up a tree. OK, freaked out now!

Ride as fast as I can past where the snake was and try to enjoy this bike ride. I look up to see cow sculls and jaw bones nailed to several trees along the path! "What in the world, where are we"?? Now, this is getting weird!
I am really not having fun at this point. We then realize we missed our turn and are now on the "green " trail, which of course is more challenging than the yellow.
Chris is feeling very bad for me now. After eight miles in the woods he gets us back safely to our campsite as fast as possible and our very weird bike ride is over.

V is for Vacation

                               We must rest to recuperate....

Mark 6:31 And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” 

U is for Under the water

From the moment we arrived and I stared across the lake I thought to myself "I have to swim across that".

 Where we live swimming in April is considered a bit too cold and maybe a bit crazy for swimming. For me, it's the perfect time of year to swim. Yes, that first step in the water is cold, refreshingly cold. Next is the moment you either tip toe in, tourchering yourself or just dive in and under! The latter is my preference.
While we sat staring at the lake on Thursday I said to  my husband "this is it, this is the time for my swim". Unquestionably an odd time for me to take this challenge on. It was later in the afternoon, I was tired, and we had just finished an underestimated 8 mile mountain bike trail ride.

But...it was the perfect time. The water was calm, no boats whizzing past. It was now or never. As I got ready, swim suit..goggles..towel...water, my husband got the kayak and himself ready.

                      Off I went, taking that first plunge under the water.

 Trying to keep the kayak on  my right side so I wouldn't wander off course. I wandered. Swimming to the left, to the right, into the kayak, into the paddle, maybe even in a circle. Oh well, I couldn't see a thing under water and aiming for "a tree" when the whole shoreline is treed is harder than it looks.

However, with my hubby's guidance and a few taps with the paddle I made it across and back! Every now and then as I was swimming I would look down and wonder " what is under the water"? No...don't think about that, just keep swimming!

T is for Tikis at Twilight

It looks like I will be posting the remainder of the challenge all at once. I have kept up with it, from a hand written note pad while on a week long camping trip. 

My husband and I have been living in the great outdoors enjoying this beautiful spring weather!
As many of our camping trips go, this one did not go as planned right from the start. Our plan to camp at a new campground at Lake Arbuckle in Oklahoma was abruptly changed to a campground much closer to home. More on that story in a following post.
Needless to say our unplanned trip that should have taken 45 minutes took us 7 hours from start to finish. The finish being camper set up, sitting in our comfy camping chairs mesmerized by the lake with the initial sigh "ahhhh".
This is that perfect time of day, right before it gets dark, at Twilight. Just the right moment to light the Tiki's.

S is for Swimming to Antartica...Tales of along distance swimmer

Each year I a participate in the A~Z challenge I like to suggest a book or two I have read that has influenced my life in some way.
Since I decided to take a little break fom running and returned to my love of swimming I felt this book would be appropriate for this year.
Legendary  swimmer Lynn Cox does a wonderful job at not only engaging you in this sports memior but also fills the pages with descriptions of all the people, places and events that take place during this time in her life.

This is a story that will inspire, teach and touch you. My husband and I both read it and couldn't put it down. I hope you pick up a copy and enjoy this book as much as we did!